Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Gay Marriage

1. Marriage is a religious sacrement. Under our constitution, the States can not legally marry anybody.
2. Whether Gays can marry is entirely up to their religion.
3. States can authorize civil unions and can grant civil union status to any marriage.
4. States can restrict the granting of civil union status on the basis of public policy. For example,
they may demand that both members of a prospective couple be tested for AIDS, syphillus, or any other STD and that the results be made known to both prospective partners. They may establish a minimum age at which an individual may enter into a civil union. They may deny civil unions to incestuous relationships.
5. At issue is whether a state can deny civil union status on the basis of sexual orientation. Were they to do so, would not the next steps be to deny the protection of the courts, employment, housing, and even food on the same basis?

Tuesday, July 12, 2005


Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "s" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "it's all right?" well, it isn't all right so why don't we say, "that hurt, you stupid idiot?"

why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you to do it?

And obviously if at first you don't succeed, then don't take up sky diving!

And ......

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends, if they're okay, then it's you.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

To the War Crimes Tribunal

If the court please:
The indiscriminate bombing of civilians in the mountains of eastern Afghanistan by the United States during the period from 28 June to ?? July 2005 should be not confused with the massive “rastrellamento” the German SS conducted of the mountainous region around Marzabotta, Italy from 29 Sept to 1 Oct 1944 which killed thousands of civilians. They were Nazi's. We aren't.
Besides, I have not now, nor ever been a member of the Neoconservative Party. I was opposed to the wars in Afghanistan, Iraq, and Colombia. Alas, any sign of protest on my part would have been greeted with indignation by my neighbors. In any event, I was just following orders.